Later Sunday evening, before an already-shook Chicago area was about to be hit with the worst pro football game since the invention of the pink headband, Carlos Boozer explained just how he mangled his right hand.
[Photos: More images of new Bull Carlos Boozer]
As quoted by the Arlington Heights Daily Herald's Mike McGraw:
"It happened last night, probably 5:30-6 o'clock at night, got it looked at right away. I find out for sure today when I saw the hand specialist. I'm going to get it done as soon as possible, so Tuesday morning I'm going in early to get the surgery taken care of so I can start my rehab process.[Related: Player misses time with pizza-place injury ]
"It was just dark. My doorbell had rang and I tripped over a bag, tried to brace myself and it popped. I jumped back up, opened the door and my hand was still a little bit numb.
"It was a gym bag. It was a big bag I had first thing over here at the hotel for training camp. I went back to my place, hadn't unpacked the bag yet, came around the corner, running to get the door and fell over it. I'm 265, 5 percent body fat. I'm heavy, man. I guess I had to brace myself and my weight just collapsed the bone right there."
Ouch. At-home injuries are just the worst for guys like this, because nobody believes you. Last summer I destroyed my big toe just walking into a heavy industrial fan, and everybody believed it, because they knew I was clumsy enough to pull off something like that, and don't really enjoy an interesting enough life to hurt it any other way. Pro athletes, even ones as injury prone as Boozer, still get no benefit of the doubt.
How do I know this? Well, based on some research I did in a parking lot Sunday night after the Bears game, the general consensus is that Carlos popped the bone in a thumb wrestling bout with Tom Donaghy (not "Tim," just a guy named "Tom Donaghy"), while James Caan and Rahm Emanuel cheered on from behind a two-way mirror. Should make for an interesting recovery.